9.11.09

Things that give me anxiety: Figure Skating

Here's the precipice:
  • Some graceful, swan-like creature skating over a sheet of ice (cold, hard, slippery)
  • Skating on skates (a thin, sharp piece of metal)

So basically: Balancing precariously on a thin sharp metal blade, on a hard and slippery surface.

And then they decide to jump. Graceful, swan like creatures, leaping into the air, and landing on a hard slippery surface, while balancing on a thin, sharp metal blade. Often landing on one foot, I might add. All their weight, compounded by the force of gravity, on one foot, that is resting on a thing blade of metal, that is then balancing on a cold, hard, slippery surface. Can I make that any clearer?
Any minute I'm expecting these graceful, swan-like creatures to break at the ankles, then the knees, for their skate to come unhinged and fling dangerously into their thighs or stab someone in the crowd, then for them to come toppling down onto cold hard ice and crack their faces open.
And then they show them in slow motion. Oh god.

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